(journal entry 8/20)
Saturday morning before school starts…heavy heart searching for some relief
Thinking about Grace’s first day in 8th grade and how she will feel walking into the 8th grade building…How will her teachers treat her? She doesn’t want special attention…but it’s hard to ignore the fact that some of her teachers were the last teachers Warren ever had.
Will seeing his locker be difficult..?
How to face another day where Warren’s absence seems to be more obvious and painful
Everything about summer ending and school beginning is not at all how it should be for our family … Jesus help
(journal entry 8/21)
School starts tomorrow…I can’t stop crying…trying to hide the tears
Jesus help me to rise up!
Jesus help me to keep my focus on You.
The last 3 or 4 days have been waves and waves of emotion…lots and lots of tears. The rollercoaster of ups and downs has been exhausting. My heart has been victim to to the unrelenting pain of missing Warren and wishing so much that he was here to start his sophomore year.
Helping Grace get ready for 8th grade…so exciting and yet so surreal. This will be the year she passes Warren in school and age. She will do things he never got the chance to do…8th grade dance, planning for HS etc. Everything about the next few months will be especially hard as we get closer to November 24th. It’s just hard to wrap my brain around the fact that 2 years ago we were living life like we had years and years of time ahead of us…but in reality we had 94 days, 3 months and 2 days, 66 week days & 28 weekend days…
Sometimes I wish I’d known…not all the details, but enough to know I needed to make each minute of every day count. But that’s crazy! Of course I wouldn’t have wanted to know, but I often wonder how much time I wasted on things that absolutely did not matter…It’s a slippery slope when I let myself think this way-regret & guilt are not fun ever, but especially when you can’t go back and make things “right”.
So….Live with no regrets! Love deeply..tell them…OFTEN! Hug…OFTEN! (no matter how old they are) Laugh…Ask questions…Talk at dinner…Put love notes in their lunch (no matter how old they are 🙂 ) Tuck them in at night and snuggle in the morning to wake them up! And most importantly, if you don’t already, talk to them about Jesus!!!!!
Serve Jesus together…go to church and worship together…pray together, read your Bible together. They aren’t too young OR too old!! This is one regret you DON’T want to have!
(and…this doesn’t apply just to your children, but your spouse, your family and friends…LOVE them well and LOVE Jesus with everything you’ve got!)
Hmmm…not even sure I meant to travel down that road, but maybe I needed the reminder to make the most of my days with Jesus…
First Day of 8th Grade…
We did it!!! HE did it…. If you could see my face and hear my voice when I say that “He did it!!” you would know that a huge “AMEN!” is in order…. Everything that took place in this house on Monday morning was just like yours. Well…maybe…we take LOTS of pictures (lawwwts), so that might be different 😉 But we woke up extra early, ate a good breakfast (which may or may not happen on a regular basis), had all our supplies ready, and took ‘first day’ pics! All of this with NO tears…and believe me when I say tears are good and healthy and I should know…I cry all the time…however, Grace and Bill do not, so it was such a gift to me (and them) for mom to not cry!! Thank you Jesus!
Thank you Jesus for the “storm” before the “calm”… If I was judging how Monday would go based on Saturday and Sunday…it wasn’t going to be good. Instead, His grace was sufficient & we each experienced it beyond measure, and we had a “normal” day.
Opportunity and Courage…
No doubt this school year will bring difficult days as well as days filled with MORE of Jesus… However, whether in the middle of a storm or calm, we will praise him. Maybe through tears or even gritted teeth, but it’s only because of Jesus that we can face either.
Praying this school year brings more opportunity to Rise Up & Shine (to be radiant with the glory of the Lord Is. 60:1) and the courage to share our faith.
Live wisely among those who are not believers, and make the most of every opportunity. Let your conversation be gracious and attractive, so that you will have the right response for everyone. Col. 4:5-6